Please repeat after the neighbourhood megaphone:
MY taxes are not, I repeat NOT, to be used UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES, for things from which I do not DIRECTLY BENEFIT. For instance if I do not go for walks in woods then MY MONEY must not be used to support the COMMUNISTS at the Forestry Commission and their RAMBLING ASSOCIATION RUNNING DOGS. I like concrete and tarmac and sometimes sandy beaches so FUCK FORESTS because I do not use them.
I do not benefit from the equipment given to disabled people because I AM NOT DISABLED. Do I look like a CRIPPLE to you? Then why are MY TAXES going to support them? Literally support them, I mean LITERALLY. What kind of messed up world is this?
And why are MY TAXES going to scrounging students who are the ones who benefit from their degree? THEY SHOULD PAY. I am perfectly happy with a society without university graduates so FUCK STUDENTS – I don’t owe them anything. What have former students ever done for me, eh? I said EH? Tell me THAT!
If I do not need to use needle exchanges, why would I need to fund them? I am not a JUNKIE. I do not want my taxes to go to JUNKIES. I want my taxes to go to things that I NEED, like bin collections. I want my BINS collected goddamn it!
And no I DON’T GIVE A FUCK that the binman gets minimum wage from the subcontractor because the local council was forced to outsource it by Westminster. And no I DON’T GIVE A FUCK that because he’s on minimum wage he can’t afford to pay for the basics of life, I SURE AS HELL am not going to pay for them through MY TAXES. Or for his WIFE who has to stay at home looking after the kids. And OF COURSE I don’t care that his oldest kid has Downs Syndrome. Do I have have Downs Syndrome? Do I look like a SPASTIC to you? No – then I’m not paying for his care. And no I DON’T GIVE A FUCK that the binman won’t have a pension, and I DON’T GIVE A FUCK, that when he’s sacked from his casual contract he won’t have benefits because I’M NOT ON BENEFITS SO WHY SHOULD I PAY? And no I DON’T GIVE A FUCK that he won’t get a pension, I just know that I’M not paying for HIS pension.
Just collect my bins and SHUT THE FUCK UP Mr Binman. For through the medium of government propaganda I channel George Osborne, David Cameron and Nick Clegg IN ONE BODY. Do you hear me? I RULE!
Please repeat this announcement three times before every meal and ten times before bed. Thank you. **fizz, CRACKLE~~pfFT**